More Than Words Read online

  More Than Words

  Copyright © 2021 Daphne Abbott

  All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission from the author. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted material in violation of the author's rights. All characters and storylines are the property of the author and your support and respect are appreciated. The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

  This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

  Cover Design: Daphne Abbott

  Edited by: Represent Publishing

  This book is dedicated to anyone that worries you’ll never be enough.

  You already are.

  Content Warning

  This book contains topics which may be triggering for some readers. If you are sensitive to any of the below topics please proceed with caution:

  Fat shaming

  Slut shaming

  Religious fanaticism

  Discussion of suicide

  Mild violence

  Contents

  Content Warning

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Epilogue

  Author’s Note

  Also Available

  About the Author

  Chapter 1

  Ruby

  I always wanted to be popular, but what popular entailed eluded me. For years, I sat in my tiny attic room and dreamt about what it would be like to have the newest toys, the nicest clothes, and the best hair. I convinced myself that the other girls’ popularity was like a code I could unlock. Once I had the key, my life would be perfect.

  Ah, the idiocy of youth.

  Perfect was an illusion the other girls sold to each other to hide the divorces, eating disorders, and mental health issues that they hid from the rest of the town. Appearances were everything to the popular girls, it was their commodity, and they guarded it more closely than government secrets.

  Part of me couldn’t fault anyone who wanted to keep their private life private. I was the notoriously illegitimate daughter of the town’s wild child turned exotic dancer. If anyone could sympathize with needing a little anonymity in the tiny town of Eagle Creek, Wisconsin, it was me.

  And yet, as I scanned groceries for my childhood bully, all my sympathy seemed to evaporate.

  “I cannot believe it’s August already, can you?” Jamie Duperre said as she looked down her recently rehabbed nose at me. “I mean, it feels like the last day of school was just yesterday.”

  “Mmm-hmm,” I murmured as I slid a packet of noodles across the belt toward my teenage co-worker to bag.

  “Between summer camps, family vacations, and my volunteer work at the church, I haven’t had a moment to myself this summer.”

  I made another noncommittal noise in response to Jamie as I slid a glance toward Sarah at the end of the conveyor belt. She rolled expressive brown eyes at me and I watched her shoulders shake with suppressed laughter. This was only her second run-in with Jamie, my high school nemesis. If Sarah was going to last more than a few days at the job, she’d have to get a crash course in “Karen 101.”

  “Keith promised me we could have a couple’s holiday later in the year…”

  It didn’t surprise me that Jamie was still rambling, even though neither Sarah nor I had said a word in at least five minutes. This woman was the consummate “Karen.” She had a “can I see the manager” attitude and bleach-blonde hair offset by an outfit that was so expensive it looked garish in the store’s fluorescent lights. Her husband, Keith, was a podiatrist at the county hospital, which made Jamie act even more entitled than when she was just the meanest of the mean girls.

  Jamie, and her kind, were the reason I’d avoided taking this job for months after I lost my job with the death of my Great-Uncle Adam. There hadn’t been enough money left after his funeral to keep his art gallery open, and there wasn’t much work in my tiny hometown that wasn’t attached to the seasonal tourist trade. So, night clerk at the local Junction Food & Drug was my new career.

  “Here,” Jamie said. In her limp hand was a wad of clipped coupons. “I’m sure one of these will work.”

  I bit back a groan. The store was transitioning to electronic coupons, and technically, I had instructions to discourage paper coupons. But I was not about to have that conversation with Jamie. I took the papers and began the arduous task of hand-keying each one in while Jamie started a new story about one of her crotch goblins. Why did she even have two of them? We were only twenty-six, wasn’t that too early for kids? Not that I had a problem with kids. I liked kids just fine. I just didn’t fully trust anything that shared DNA with Jamie Duperre.

  I was deep into typing the third coupon in the system when the automatic doors swished open behind me, and a blast of sultry air blew into the store. But it wasn’t the difference in temperature that had the skin on the back of my neck prickling in awareness.

  It was him.

  Without looking up from my task, I knew exactly who’d entered the store. I always knew when he came in, like he was a lightning rod, pulling me toward him despite any effort otherwise. The sharp inhale from Jamie only confirmed my suspicion. Our latest customer was the mysterious silver fox that had been haunting my dreams for six months.

  Since he first appeared in the store, the guy had enthralled me with his crooked smile, piercing blue eyes, tall and athletic body, silver-tipped dark hair, and adorable country boy accent. He was sweet and funny and polite, which was such a change from most customers. I would have loved him for just that. Every time he called me by my name with that voice that sounded smooth, smokey, and southern, like good bourbon, I had to fight the urge to collapse in a puddle of hormones on the floor.

  “Who. Is. That?” Jamie’s typical sex kitten purr was stilted, and her natural accent slipped out.

  I bit back a laugh and shrugged. “I didn’t see.”

  “You,” Jamie said and snapped her fingers toward Sarah. “You have to know.”

  “I just started working here two days ago,” Sarah said and sounded about as rattled as I felt. Poor thing, the first glance of mister tall, silver, and swooney was a lot for a girl to take.

  Jamie made a noise of disgust and I felt her eyes on the side of my head. “Well?”

  I finished typing the last coupon — none of
them worked — and looked up at Jamie. “Sorry?”

  “Ruby Sparkles McLean,” Jamie said with an evil grimace. It may have been intended as a smile, but it just ended up looking ghoulish in the sickly yellow-green lighting of the store. “You’ve been working here for years. You have to know.”

  Because I knew it was useless to correct her about how long I’d been working at The Junction, I ignored that jab. “Your total is $87.50. Do you have a Junction Card?”

  “What? No.”

  “Would you like to sign up? It takes only a few moments, and you’ll be eligible for special in-store saving—”

  “No,” Jamie snapped. “I don’t need your stupid card.”

  “I should let you know—”

  “Are you fucking deaf, Sparkles?”

  That was twice she’d used my middle name to taunt me. Maybe if she said it once more, I’d turn into Beetlejuice. My mom had named me Ruby Sparkles McLean because she was a 15-year-old girl with a brand-new baby and she thought it was cool. She’d never considered how that name would give every asshole in town a reason to ridicule me.

  “I apologize, but management requires that I tell each customer about the new program. Now, I am sorry, but none of your paper coupons qualified for any discounts. If you like, I can show you the savings you’d receive under the new card,” I said, and I could hear the tightness in my voice. If Jamie hung around too much longer, I’d embarrass myself by screaming at her, or worse, crying.

  “I don’t have time for that. Here.” Jamie shoved a plastic card toward me. “Just ring me up. I need to get back to my family. It’s already after ten.”

  I didn’t comment that she was the one who’d chosen to shop at this hour. I also didn’t mention that the card reader was directly in front of her. Instead, I took the card and ran it for her, even though I wasn’t supposed to. She’d, at least, given up the quest to know more about the guy stalking the aisles like some apex predator.

  As I completed her transaction, I caught glimpses of the man moving around the aisles. Despite my best judgment, I had memorized his preferred brands and items so I could almost predict his path. He would start in the produce department. Most weeks, he filled his cart with so many fruits and vegetables I’d assumed he was a vegetarian for a while. Next, he went to the tiny organic section in the rear for whole grains, beans, and granola. Then the guy worked his way to the meat department where he’d get lean chicken and pork. If he was feeling indulgent, his last stop was the frozen aisle for a pint of mint Oreo cookie ice cream.

  My favorite flavor.

  Like a girl obsessing over a teen heartthrob in a magazine, I cherished the fact that we shared a love for the same treat. Since all his other purchases seemed to be premium brands, healthy and organic, I assumed it was the only thing we had in common. If he ever saw the cheap hamburger, ramen, Diet Coke, and frozen pizza I ate, he’d tell me to go to a nutritionist.

  “Here’s your receipt. I applied some in-store credits, and you saved $9.23 today. Do you need help loading your purchases into your car?” I asked and held out her receipt.

  Indecision crossed Jamie’s face. It looked like she wanted to squeeze me for more details about the guy. However, she couldn’t loiter by the register without her motives being obvious to Sarah and me. Since appearances were so important to the woman, I knew she had no other choice, and I couldn’t stop the small grin from forming on my lips.

  Jamie narrowed her eyes and snatched the receipt from my hand. “Yes, you can load my bags for me. Thanks, Ruby.”

  “I’ve got it,” Sarah piped up, and I loved her at that moment. She turned to give a bright smile. “If you’ll show me your vehicle, we’ll get you on your way.”

  I almost snorted out loud, so I grabbed the box for candy refills from below my register and busied myself with restocking the end-cap. Not only did it allow me to keep my back to them, but it gave me a decent view of the front half of the store. From this vantage point, I could watch out for the fox.

  Chapter 2

  Gray

  Why did I find the supermarket at night to be one of the most relaxing places in my new town? In the last fifteen years, my constant companion, insomnia, had forced me into some odd routines and behaviors. But grocery shopping had never been one of my coping mechanisms, not until Ruby.

  We didn’t know each other except for the pleasantries we exchanged each time I came into the store. Despite my attempts to flirt with the curvy redheaded beauty, she still kept me firmly at bay. Ruby could be sharp-tongued and snarky, but she was also witty and observant. No matter the topic, she always had something interesting to say. I often spent hours before visiting the shop researching something new to bring up as she scanned my items.

  My crush was epic, and sometimes Ruby felt like the grounding rod that kept me tied to this place. I’d come to Eagle Creek about a year ago to help save my dead friend Jonah’s family from financial ruin. Ruby and her clever mind, curvaceous body, and expressive eyes kept me coming back to The Junction week after week.

  I sped through my list, grabbing food and supplies by rote. Even though I was a Texan raised by a mother that felt full bellies equaled full hearts, I didn’t put too much effort into my meals these days. It didn’t seem necessary when I was the only one eating the meal. My roommate and best friend, Hunter, was just as ambivalent as I was. It made meal prep easy when neither of us gave a shit as long as it was enough to keep us going.

  As I rounded the corner of the last aisle, I could see that Ruby was alone at her register, refilling the candies on the end-cap. The previous customer and the young bagger must have left when I was racing through the aisles. A little thrill shot through me at the chance to talk to Ruby alone.

  Fuck, I had it bad.

  I saw Ruby jerk, then pause in her task. I stopped and watched her for a moment, making sure I hadn’t startled her. As I waited, my muscles twitched. I had an itch to get closer, but I respected Ruby too much to overcrowd her. When she seemed to shake herself free, I approached at a slower pace, like a nature photographer stalking a skittish animal. Ruby spared a brief glance for me before she scuttled around the aisle and back to her spot behind the register.

  I plastered my most friendly and charming smile on my face as I pulled the cart to the conveyor belt and began unloading. “Hey Ruby,” I said.

  “Hey,” she said. Her voice sounded rusty like she hadn’t used it in weeks. “Did you find everything okay?”

  I laughed and tossed my ice cream on the belt. “Yeah, thanks. How are you doing this week?”

  I looked up in time to see Ruby lick her lips, a blush creeping up her neck from beneath the ugly green collar of her uniform shirt. Actually, ugly was not the correct word. Even the shapeless polo and black pants should have looked horrible; Ruby’s curves made the outfit look as tempting as an expensive dress. I’d give anything to know what was underneath that forest green polo.

  Enough, don’t be a creeper.

  I had to remind myself of that more often than I cared to admit.

  “I’m okay, and yourself?” Ruby asked with eyes glued firmly to the conveyor belt.

  “The framing for the new restaurant at the marina is done, so that feels good.” I pushed the cart to the end of the lane just as Ruby’s young co-worker came back inside. “Hi, I’m Gray,” I said with a smile and a wave.

  The girl stopped in her tracks, and her eyes bugged out. Was I giving off the wrong vibes? I’d always been friendly and outgoing; I didn’t know any other way to be. But the women of Eagle Creek reacted to me like I was some kind of weirdo. Maybe my personality could be as big as my home state. Maybe my questions and random trivia were weird. Maybe I had the personality of a golden retriever.

  But I didn’t know any other way to be.

  “Hey,” the girl mumbled and tucked a long lock of brown hair behind an ear. “Sarah.”

 
; “Nice to meet you,” I said. “Just started?”

  “Yeah,” she replied. This time her voice sounded stronger. “Last Monday. Ruby’s training me.”

  “Well, she’s the best, so I’m sure you’re in good hands.”

  Sarah laughed but didn’t say anything more. I turned back to Ruby, who was just scanning the last of my items. “Did you know that loons are more closely related to penguins than ducks?”

  Both Ruby and Sarah were silent for several long beats. I started to worry my late-night fact-finding had pulled up some fake loon facts. Admittedly, I was scraping the bottom of the barrel for fun facts to give me chances to talk to Ruby. But there were only so many interesting animal facts a guy could use to woo a woman.

  “That makes sense considering Wisconsin is more closely related to Antarctica than any state in the union,” Ruby said in a deadpan tone.

  Sarah and I both laughed.

  “You got that right,” said the teenager. “There’s nothing worse than a Wisconsin January.”

  “How do you think I feel? I moved here from Florida last September.”

  Both Ruby and Sarah goggled at me.

  “Why would you do that?” Sarah asked as if she couldn’t think of a single reason.

  “He’s the one that bought the marina from the Mason family,” Ruby said quietly. Then she turned to me, the blush still on her neck and cheeks. “Your total is $35.98.”

  That blush made the blood rush in my body, and all I wanted to do is ask her to call me by my name. Just once. Though we’d never had the traditional introduction I’d learned her name from the name tag she wore, and she must have heard mine in passing or seen it on my cards when I paid. It felt like a conscious decision. Like if she said my name, it’d give me some kind of power like Voldemort.

  I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket and answered Sarah’s question even though Ruby had already given most of the story. “I was in the service with Jonah. After … after he passed, the Mason’s became like a second family.”

  “Ugh, I don’t know. If I was warm in Florida, I don’t think even family would get me back here,” Sarah said as she finished bagging my food.